Searching for a Better Life - Reflection

The first week of our series on searching for a better life we talked about the importance of standing up, standing firm, and then standing back up when we need to.  Standing with God is an important part of finding that better life.  The third week we talked about living with restraint, which calls for us to walk away from the old life of sin and into the new life of Christ.  Walking with God is an important part of finding that better life.  Today we are going to close the series by talking about a way of living that is hard for many of us because it calls for us to be still and simply be present with God.  Sitting with God is an important part of finding that better life.

One of the most influential people in my life was my Grandmother.  She had a house at the beach that we lived in for several years when my Dad got out of the army, and even after we moved into our own house, I spent as much time with my grandmother at that house as I could.  As much as I loved being at the beach, the moments that were the most formative for me, and the times I treasure to this day, were the times I simply sat on the porch with my Grandmother.  We would sit and talk.  We would sit and read, my grandmother was a voracious reader, and we would sit and just enjoy the beauty of the ocean, the beach, the sunsets, and the friends and neighbors all around us.  In so many ways, the better life was found in simply sitting together.

For all of us, the better life will be found when we take the time to stop, be still, and sit with God.  The better life will be found when we reflect on our lives, our faith, and the many blessings that we have.  In fact, if we don’t stop and reflect from time to time, we might miss the fact that we are living the better life right now.  In in our lives, it is often stillness and reflection that is driven out by our busyness, which is why one of the 10 Commandments is still so powerful today – Remember the Sabbath.

In all the busyness of the world, God is telling us to stop and set aside time in the rhythm of our lives to be still and do nothing but reflect.  The Sabbath needs to be a day where we spend some intentional time sitting with God.  And as we sit with God, there are four words we need to reflect on.  These four words help define our lives and our relationship with God.  These four words, taken together, will help us see the better life we have with God.

The first word is Creator.  The Bible is clear that God is the creator of all things.  In Genesis 1 it says, in the beginning, God.  And then God created everything.  As we sit in the presence of God we need to remember that it is God who created the world and all that’s in it.  Psalm 24:1-2. 

When we say that God created all things, we are also saying that God created us, and God created us to be special and unique in all the universe.  In Genesis 1 it says that we were created in God’s likeness, and in Genesis 2 it says God breathed into us the breath of life.  We are God’s children, created in God’s image.  This doesn’t mean we look like God in the physical sense, it means that like God we have a creative spirit, intellect, and the capacity to love - like God.  As God’s children, we are valued and loved above all of everything else in the world.  Jesus said that when a sparrow falls to the ground, God knows about it, and yet we are more important than the sparrows.

During this series we have been looking at Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, and in Ephesians 3:19 it says, God created all things.  And then in Ephesians 1:4 it says we were chosen by God before the creation of the world.  Think about it, before God created anything God was thinking about us.  Before the light or planets, plants or animals, God was planning our lives.  And in Ephesians 2:10 it says, we are God’s handiwork.  We were lovingly crafted and created by God to reflect his love and life.

When we reflect on God as the creator we are not just thinking about the power and majesty of the world around us, we are also thinking about the value and purpose of our own lives.  No matter what my life might be like, I have value and worth.  Regardless of what anyone else might say about me, I am loved and cared for by God.  Reflecting on God as our creator can lead us to a better life because we begin to see the value and worth and dignity that each and every one of us has.

Reflecting on God as the creator and seeing God’s hand at work in the world and in our lives is important because the world wants to discount the presence of God in creation.  Even talking about God in the creative process of the universe can be controversial.  In 1966 Time magazine ran a cover story, Is God Dead?  With science being able to explain more and more of what we were seeing in our world, the article asked if we really needed to see a God behind anything in creation.  Since the 1960’s, as scientific study of the universe has increased, more and more scientists are actually saying that the evidence points to a God behind the creation of the world.

Scientists have discovered that there are about 200 parameters that are necessary for life as we know it to exist on earth.  For example, we need a star that can produce light, but we need to be the right distance from that star to have the right amount of light and heat.  We need the right mix of gases in the atmosphere, elements in the soil, and we need the presence of water.  I also just read this week that we also need the gravitational pull of larger planets in our solar system to help pull asteroids away from us so we aren’t constantly bombarded and destroyed.  I never thought of that before.  These are just some of the things science says are essential for life to exist.

Scientists have calculated that the probability of all 200 of these parameters coming together in perfect union is almost impossible to calculate.  In a 2015 Wall Street Journal article, Eric Metaxas said, the odds against the universe existing are so heart-stoppingly astronomical that the notion that it all “just happened” defies common sense.  It would be like tossing a coin and having it come up heads 10 Quintilian times in a row.  (A Quintilian is 1 followed by 18 zeros! 1,000,000,000,000,000,000)

Fred Hoyle, the astronomer who gave us the term “big bang,” said that his atheism was “greatly shaken” at these developments.  He wrote, “a common-sense interpretation of the facts suggests that a super-intellect has monkeyed with the physics, as well as with chemistry and biology.”

Theoretical physicist Paul Davies has said that “the appearance of design is overwhelming,” and Oxford professor Dr. John Lennox has said, “the more we get to know about our universe, the more the hypothesis that there is a Creator . . . gains in credibility as the best explanation of why we are here.”  While we often think that science leads us away from God, the reality is that the more science teaches us about the universe, the more it seems to point us to the reality that there is an intelligent, even loving, God behind it all.

So we need to reflect on the creator of the world and grab hold of this idea that our lives are not an accident.  we are not here by chance.  We were created by a God who is not distant and uninvolved but is part of our world, part of our lives, and loves us.  And that is the second word we need to reflect on, Love.  The word love is used 23 times in the book of Ephesians.  We hear about God’s love in Ephesians 2:4-5, and then in Ephesians 3:17b-19.

We need to sit with God and reflect on his love for us, but as we do we need to be clear about what love is and isn’t.  Too often we define love as getting what we want, and getting our own way.  If a child doesn’t get what they want from their parents, what is it they often say?  If you really loved me you would give me…  How many times are we guilty of the same thing with God?  God if you really loved me I wouldn’t be going through this.  If you really loved me you would give me what I want.  While God does give us good gifts in love, God’s love doesn’t mean we always get what we want.

As challenging as it is, it is often through the difficult times in life, when we don’t get what we want, that we need to sit in the presence of God and reflect on God’s love for us in that moment because God’s love is there.  It is always there.  In all times and through all things - God loves us.   It’s easy to sit with God and give thanks for his love when things are going well, it is hard, but infinitely more rewarding, to sit in God’s presence and give thanks for God’s love when things aren’t going well.  That is when the power of God’s love is more clearly seen and experienced.

The third word we need to reflect on is not an easy one because it points to our own weakness and failure, and that word is Sin.  Sin is simply our turning away from God.  It is turning away from God’s love and the life God wants for us.  Sin is missing the mark in our relationship with God, and in how we live our lives.  It is important for us to sit and reflect on our sin because it is these moments of reflection that keep us humble and show us where we need God’s love to be at work.

Sin not only hurts our relationship with God, it hurts our relationships with others, so we need to acknowledge our sin so relationships can be strengthened and healed.  Sitting with God and reflecting on our sin is not something we need to dwell on and wallow in, but it is something we have to be honest about.  We can never get to a better life if we aren’t willing to acknowledge the areas of our lives where things need to get better. 

This leads us to the final word of reflection as we sit with God, Forgiven.  The Bible says when we confess our sin, God is faithful and just and will forgive us.  The prophet Isaiah said that while our sin is as red as blood, God’s grace and forgiveness will wash us as white as snow.  God’s forgiveness washes us clean, it redeems us from an old life, and brings us to a new and a better life with Christ.  We can never allow sin to be the end of our reflection with God, we need to always end with forgiveness, and Ephesians is full of this message of forgiveness.  Ephesians 1:7,   2:1-5,   4:32-5:2,   5:8.

As we reflect on the forgiveness that God offers, we need to remember the price of that forgiveness - the life and death of Jesus.  The life of Jesus was a constant reflection of God’s love and grace reaching out to forgive and redeem people and Jesus also talked about the need for us to forgive one another in order to find the better life.   What ultimately forgives us of sin and allows us to forgive others is the death of Jesus.  It is his blood that washes us clean.  The Bible says the wages of sin is death, but Jesus’ death on the cross paid the price for us all.  When we accept the love of our creator and allow the forgiveness of God given to us in Jesus to wash over us, we are set free and we find and begin to experience a better life.

We need to reflect more and more on this amazing forgiveness of God because it is only by accepting God’s forgiveness for ourselves that we are able to overcome the guilt and shame of sin that brings.  It is only in accepting God’s grace and love that we are set free to find the better life we are searching for.   

A better life is found when we sit with God and reflect on how God has created us and how much God loves us.  A better life is found when we humble ourselves and reflect on our weakness, failure, and sin, but we can never let that be the end of our time with God.  The better life is found when we reflect on, celebrate, and accept for ourselves the forgiveness of God given through Jesus Christ.  Ultimately, the better life is found when we accept Jesus as our savior and strive day after day to make him our Lord.
 
Next Steps
Searching for a Better Life - Reflection
As important as it is to Stand with God, and Walk with God, it is equally important for us to Sit with God.  Take time to reflect on how these 4 words can lead you to a better life.

Creator
● Read and reflect on Genesis 1.
● Where do you see the handiwork of God in creation?
● How does science help you see God as the creator?
● Each day identify one part of creation for which you are specifically grateful.

Love
● Read and Reflect on Ephesians 2:4-5, 3:17-19, 5:1-2.
● Where have you been able to see God’s love at work in your life?  In your family?  In the church?
● How is God calling you to share his love with others?
● What one thing can you do this week to share God’s love?

Sin
● Read and Reflect on Ephesians 2:1-3, 4:25-32.
● Humble yourself before God and confess your sin.
● Sit in silence and ask God to reveal the dark areas of your life.
● Reflect on whether there is someone you need to ask to forgive you.  Ask them for forgiveness.

Forgiveness
● Read and Reflect on Ephesians 1:7, 2:1-5.
● Place all your sin in your hands and lift them up to God in prayer.
● Bring your hands back filled with the gift of God’s love and forgiveness.
● Lay your hands over your heart and allow God’s love and forgiveness to fill you to overflowing.

Searching for a Better Life - Relish Life

Whether it was the Pilgrims who traveled to the new world 399 years ago, or immigrants who are seeking to make this country their home today, most people come to America searching for a better life.  Some are looking for religious and political freedom while others are looking for economic opportunity, but they are all looking for something that was defined in our declaration of independence as an inalienable right, the pursuit of happiness.  For most of us, a better life involves being happy, so what makes you happy?

For some people, happiness comes with travelling and experiencing new things, for others it’s when they get to go shopping and buy new things.  For some people, happiness comes with a new job, for others when they get to quit a job or maybe retire.  For some people, happiness comes when a relationship ends, for others when a relationship begins.  For some, happiness comes when we are able to eat, drink, and be merry.  What makes you happy? 

Toys often make children happy, at least for a few moments.  Do you know what company is the largest distributor of toys in the world?  You might be surprised to learn that it is not a toy store or even amazon but McDonalds, and it all started 40 years ago with the introduction of the happy meal.  McDonalds has been distributing toys for 40 years and some of the happy meal toys have become real collectibles.  There were beanie babies, furbies, and collectible figures to go with every Disney movie ever released.  The real question is whether or not the happy meal really made children happy, and the answer is yes, for about 5 minutes.  Who doesn’t love a hamburger, french fries, and a little plastic toy.

What is profound about the happy meal is that it brings together two things that many of us turn to for happiness - food and toys.  We often turn to food and stuff to make us happy, but the sad truth is that neither one makes us happy for very long, and we see that in the happy meal as well.  The happy meal is empty calories and a cheap toy that bring instant gratification but no lasting happiness for body or soul.  In many ways the happy meal is symbolic of a worldly pursuit of happiness that fails to deliver. 

As we search for a better life and pursue happiness, what is it that will ultimately make us happy?  If our happiness is based in anything we find in this world, it will eventually let us down, but if our happiness can be found in God, it will not only last but it will see us through all the challenges of life.  In Ephesians 1:3-4, the Apostle Paul begins to shed some light on the source of happiness. 

In the Message, a modern translation of the Bible, it says this:
How blessed is God! And what a blessing he is! He’s the Father of our Master, Jesus Christ, and takes us to the high places of blessing in him. Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son.

Another word for blessed and blessing is happiness.  Paul talks about celebration and gift giving which brings happiness.  And the source of all this is God’s love which makes us whole and holy.  Paul is clear that the kind of happiness that we are looking for, a happiness that will make us whole and holy, is never going to be found in the stuff or the situations of this world, and no happiness can be sustained by the things around us.  Happiness comes when we don’t look at our circumstances from day to day but consider what it is we believe about God.  To say this another way, happiness comes from Godly Reason and not human circumstances or emotions. 

If we allow our emotions to define our happiness, we will come up short every time.  If we think that our circumstances alone can keep us happy, we will be disappointed again and again.  Worldly happiness is as fleeting as a happy meal, we have to find something stronger and more secure on which to base our happiness.  We need to turn to the truth of God. 

According to Ephesians 1, God is a blessing and God blesses us.  God created us in love, to be loved, and to be part of God’s family forever.  When we failed God, God’s love didn’t fail us, and through Jesus we have been forgiven and made a part of God’s family, not for a while but forever.  So Godly reason tells us we were created in love, forgiven in love, made a family in love, and have eternal life with God all because of God’s love.  We are blessed with the gift of lasting life and love.  With God there is happiness - true happiness. 

God’s reason can lead us to happiness but a Godly Rudder is what keeps it going.  A rudder helps provides stability to a boat in a storm.  When the wind and waves toss a boat on the sea, a rudder helps keep it upright and moving in a steady direction.  In a world where we are tossed about by all kinds of issues, from health to finances, from tragic accidents to relationship failures, we need a rudder that will keep us stable, upright, and moving forward.  That rudder is God.  When everything around us falls apart, God is here to hold us together.  When everyone is against us, God is for us.  When we feel alone, God is with us.  When we have nothing, God provides us with everything. 

The Apostle Paul tells us this in Romans 8:31b-35, 37-39. 
And then again in 2 Corinthians 4:8-9. 
Life throws all kinds of storms at us and if we trust in our power and strength, we will be swamped, but if we have a Godly rudder, if we can turn to and trust in God, we will make it through. 

Today we are happy to have Gail and Greg Spotts sharing with us Gail’s book called, Peace in the midst of the storm.  The book documents how a Godly rudder helped them find stability and direction in the midst of losing their son Darren.  Losing a child is the most devastating and difficult pain to work through and without a strong rudder to keep you going, that experience can literally destroy your life and family.  Gail shares in her book how God didn’t become her rudder during those days but how her relationship with God was her rudder. It was just there to give peace, hope, and direction in the storm. 

Gail’s book is a reflection of what it actually looks like to have God as a rudder and how we can use that relationship to help us when we go through a storm.  If you are wondering how God can be a rudder and bring you stability, hope, peace, and yes even happiness, in the midst of a storm, then I would encourage you to get a copy of the book, or talk with Gail and Greg after worship. 

Having a Godly rudder really can make all the difference.  Several years ago we held a memorial service here for a young child.  As tragic as the moment was, we were able to talk about the love of God and how the presence of Jesus can bring peace and hope even in the pain and loss of that moment.  As part of the service, Nikki Story sang the song my chains are gone, and after the service she was at a coffee shop where a woman stopped her and said, you are the woman who sang at the memorial service today.  Nikki said, yes, and the woman went on to say that her daughter had died in an accident the year before and she was angry and bitter about it all and then she said this, I didn’t know it could be like that.  What she meant was that she had no idea that people could actually find peace in the storm, or hope in the midst of pain and loss.  Having a Godly rudder really does make all the difference. 

The last thing that can help us find happiness in the world today is a Godly Relationship and not earthly stuff.  Again, when we look to the things of this world to make us happy, we will come up empty.  The happiness of a happy meal lasts until the next meal, or in the case of the toy, until the next day or until the next toy comes out.  The happiness of a new car lasts as long as the new car smell.  The happiness of a new job or a new romance lasts until the problems come.  The happiness of money never lasts because with every dollar we get we think we need one more dollar to really be happy. 

If we chase stuff and the things of this world to make us happy, we are chasing after the wind.  We will never find what we are looking for, and we will never find enough or be satisfied with what we have, so instead of looking at stuff to make us happy we need to look at our relationship with God.

What ultimately makes us happy will be pursuing God because we will discover that when we have God, we will have all that we need. I don’t know if you have figured this out yet, but searching for a better life always seems to come back to having a deeper relationship with God.  It is our relationship with God that makes us resilient, and helps us re-enlist, and live with restraint, and it is a relationship with God that  helps us relish life, or find true happiness and joy.  It all comes back to this relationship with God, and that will be part of our focus next month. 

What is important for us to understand about our relationship with God is that once we start working to strengthen that relationship, all our other relationships will improve as well, and it is often our relationships with others that bring us the most happiness.  When people reflect at the end of their lives, they don’t take an inventory of what they have accumulated but think about the people they have loved.  Dying parents don’t hang on in hospitals and nursing homes until valued objects and financial statements are brought in for them to read or touch one more time, but they do wait until children and grandchildren arrive from far away so they have one last moment of connection and love.  Stuff doesn’t make us happy - relationships make us happy and when we can get our relationship with God growing and vital, all other relationships will improve as well. 

So to truly relish life, to find deep happiness, peace, and lasting joy, we have to stop looking to the world and start looking for Godly reason and wisdom on which to build our lives, a Godly rudder which can keep us moving forward, and a Godly relationship that will fill our lives.


Next Steps
Relish Life

What makes you happy? 
● Are these things enduring?
● Can they help sustain you through difficult times?

Godly Reason
● List 5 reasons why God should be the source of your happiness. 
● Read the following passages from Ephesians and identify the reasons God can be the source of our happiness:
○ Ephesians 1:3-14
○ Ephesians 2:4-10, 2:14-22
○ Ephesians 3:14-21

Godly Rudder
● When has God helped you through a storm in life?
● What did God’s help and provision look like?
● How can God be your rudder in the storm today?
● How can you help others trust God through the storm?

Godly Relationship
● How do you currently invest in your relationship with God?
● What ONE THING can you do this week to spend more quality time with God?
● Sign up for a 3 Relationships small group to learn more about how to live in a dynamic, thriving relationship with God.

Searching for a Better Life - Restraint

There were two events that took place in the summer of 1969 that  in many ways defined the decade of the 60’s.  The first took place on July 20 when man first landed on the moon. 

Moon Landing 1969

I don’t remember the event, but my Mom said that my great grandmother literally could not believe it was happening.   For her, there was no way men could be walking on the moon that she could see up in the sky.  In her world, that just wasn’t possible, but it was possible.  The moon landing changed our nation and world because it expanded our horizons.  It opened the door to further space exploration and scientific discoveries.  We were living beyond the boundaries and it was good.

About a month later, another significant event took place on a dairy farm in Bethel NY.  What started as a three day music festival for about 40,000 people turned into a cultural event for over 400,000. 

Woodstock 1969

Woodstock came to symbolize a generation that wanted to live beyond the boundaries of socially acceptable norms.  It pushed the boundaries in sex, drugs, and rock and roll.  Some people saw this cultural revolution as a good thing, others as not so good.  I’ll let you decide that.  What is unmistakable is that Woodstock remains a symbol of the cultural freedom that so many were pushing for during the decade of the 60’s.  It is a symbol of living beyond the boundaries.

Sometimes moving outside the boundaries of our thinking and living is good because it opens up new and exciting opportunities.  Advances in science, medicine, technology and space exploration are only possible because people are willing to push the limits and think outside the boundaries of what is possible.  Sometimes living without restraint is good, but sometimes it is not good.  It is often boundaries that protect us, keep us safe, and make life better. 

When I was in New Orleans several years ago some friends and I asked the doorman at the hotel to suggest some places for us to visit.  He took out a map and circled several places and then drew some boundaries on the map.  He said, whatever you do, don’t go beyond these boundaries.  It is not safe.  Those were boundaries we didn’t cross.  We knew that restraint and living in those boundaries was essential for a better life - for life itself.

As we search for a better life, we need to understand the value of boundaries and living with Restraint.   Specifically, we need to understand the value of living within God given boundaries.  In fact, many times the better life we want will only be found by living within the boundaries set for us by God.

Last week we looked at the better life list that God gave his people in the OT.  We know this list as the 10 commandments and what these commandments established were clear boundaries.  Look at the first three commandments.  Each one set a boundary for people in how they were to  live in their relationship with God.

You shall have no other gods before Me.
You shall not make for yourself an idol.
You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.

These are clear commands that gave direction to God’s people and as long as they lived within these boundaries, as long as they showed restraint, life was good.  We also see this in the last 6 commands God gave the people.

You shall not murder.
You shall not commit adultery.
You shall not steal.
You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
You shall not covet.

Here God is setting boundaries in our behaviors with one another.  These are community or social boundaries that are not only necessary for people to live together in peace, but they are essential for good relationships and needed if we are going to experience a good life in community.  When we exercise this kind of restrain in our relationships with one another - we all experience a better life.

So the 10 commandments show us that restraint and living within the boundaries God has established is good, and that some boundaries always need to be honored, but if we think about the life and teachings of Jesus, we see that at times he called us to live outside the boundaries.  Jesus challenged long held traditions and at times pushed people outside long established boundaries. 

A great example of this is seen in the area of what was considered clean and unclean food.  For generations, only certain animals were considered clean and everything else was unclean and could not be eaten, but in Acts 10, Peter, the leader of the Christian community, had a vision where he was told by God to get up and kill all kinds of unclean animals and eat them.  At first Peter resists this saying he has never eaten anything unclean or impure, to which God said, “ Do not call anything impure what God has made clean.”  In this vision God was making all kinds of unclean animals clean.  God was extending the boundaries of what was acceptable and calling his people to live within new boundaries.

So here is the gift and the challenge for us in Jesus.  The gift is that in Jesus we have been set free.  In Christ, boundaries have been expanded and we are free to experience so much more in life, but the challenge is to know where the new boundaries lie because the better life God wants for us is still found when we experience restraint.  Paul says, while all things are permissible for us, not all things are good for us.  So we need to learn how to live within the boundaries God has for us, we need to learn how to live with restraint in the midst of God’s freedom.

The first step in living with freedom within God’s established boundaries is to walk with God.  Walking with God implies a relationship with God.  Walking with God implies slowing down and intentionally being with God, listening to God, and talking with God so we can learn all that God has for us.

Several years ago, 5 friends and I hiked up to the top of Mt. Washington.  It was a perfect day, but a long and strenuous hike.  As we were coming down the mountain I was feeling good and had gotten out in front of my friends.  I often like to be in the front of the pack in hiking and this time I had gotten very far out in front.  In fact I was so far out that I didn’t realize my friends were miles behind me and that one of the group was having trouble.  I also  had all the maps so when they came to confusing areas along the trail, they didn’t know what to do.

Finally I realized I needed to not just stop but start hiking back.  When I found my friends, let’s just say they weren’t happy with me.  I had broken relationship and trust because I was no longer walking with them.  Fortunately they were gracious and forgiving people and we can laugh about it now, but I learned something important.  Walking together means walking together.  Walking with God means being intentional in being with God, not getting too far ahead or behind, not thinking that we know the way so that we head out on our own, but  being intentional in being with God day by day by day.

Next month we are going to explore more about what can help us walk with God when we enter into our 3 Relationships campaign.  A relationship with God is just one of the 3 Relationships, but is perhaps the most important because how we engage God in his word, and in worship, and in prayer, and in our daily  lives is key to experiencing the best life possible. 

Not only do we need to walk with God but we also need to walk away from sin.  Ephesian 2:1-3a
Paul is saying that all of us at one point in time walked in sin.  We followed our own way.  We lived according to our own selfish desires, and at times we still fall back into that way of thinking and living.  Walking away from sin doesn’t happen once, instead it needs to be something we consider and commit to every day.  Paul goes on and talks about some of the specific things we need to walk away from.  Ephesians 4:22-32

We need to walk away from selfish desires and deceit.  We need to walk away from lies and anger and unwholesome talk.  We need to walk away from bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander and malice.  In all of our lives there are things we know we need to walk away from.  There are things that in all of our lives are destructive to our hearts, and lives and relationships and we need to learn how to walk away.  Every time we are able to walk away from sin we are living within the boundaries God has set for us, and every time we live within those boundaries, every time we live with restraint, we experience a better life.

But at times it is not just walking away that is needed, we need to walk in new life.  Going back to Ephesians 4, we not only see the importance of walking away from what is bad but also walking into what is good.  This means we not only walk away from bitterness and anger, but we walk into love, forgiveness, and compassion.  The better life isn’t just found when we walk away from sin but when we walk in and put on the new life God has for us in Christ.

We experience the better life when we learn to walk with God, walk away from sin, and walk in new life.  This is what a life of restraint looks like and what it means for us to live within the new boundaries God has set for us.  As we walk, there are two important things to remember.

#1 - be quick to obey.  When we hear Paul tell us to take off the old self and put on righteousness, we need to do it.  When we are told to walk away from anger, bitterness, and resentment we need to do it.  When we are told to walk in forgiveness, compassion, and love, we need to do it.  We need to not just hear these words and direction but be quick to obey.  The sooner we obey, the sooner we experience the better life.

#2 - be quick to serve.  Ephesians 5:1-2.  Be quick to love, but the specific kind of love Paul calls for here is sacrificial love, a love that gives selflessly, a love that serves.  Making the choice to serve each day, adding that to our better life list, helps us walk with God, walk away from selfishness which leads to sin, and walk more fully in the new life God has for us.  This week find one way to serve someone and experience the better life God has for you.


 
Next Steps
Searching for a Better Life - Restraint

What kind of boundaries does God set for us in the 10 Commandments?
• Are you living with restraint in these areas?
• How can living within those boundaries help you experience a better life?

Jesus brought us freedom and established new boundaries.
• What old laws and traditions did Jesus remove or revise?
• How does this help set us free?

Walk with God
• What specific practices help you daily walk with God?
• In what way can you more intentionally walk with God?

Walk away from Sin
• Read Ephesians 2:1-10 and 4:17-5:2
• Where do you need to learn to walk away?
• Pray with more conviction, “deliver me from evil.”

Walk in the New Life
• Read Ephesians 5:3-6:9
• Where do you want to experience new life?

Searching for a Better Life - Re-Enlist

Do you have a bucket list?  A bucket list are things we want to do or experience before we “kick the bucket.”  But we don’t have to be facing death to have a bucket list, in fact, for many people the bucket list becomes the list of goals that we set our sights on and give ourselves to all through life.  Here are some of the top bucket list ideas people have: to visit every continent, to visit every state, or to visit every national park in the US.  For some people it’s not traveling but experiences they want, so they set their sights on seeing the northern lights, or a full solar eclipse. 

For some people the bucket list focuses on relationships and includes things like getting married, having children, reuniting with old friends, or meeting someone whom we idolize.  For others it’s to drive a race car, ride a camel, or step off a 12 story building!  (OK, that was not on my bucket list at all but I am going to do it!)  The great thing about making a bucket list is that it helps us think about what is important in life.  What are our hopes and dreams?  It also helps us set priorities and stay focused so that we can accomplish those things that are important. 

Today, instead of thinking about a bucket list, I want us to think about a better life list.  We can’t search for and experience a better life if we aren’t able to make a list of what a better life would include.  What things do we need or want in order to experience a better life?  What is it that, for you, would lead to a better life?  Think about this for a few moments.  What would make your life better? 

Maybe your list includes financial security, job security, a better job, or just having a job.  Maybe a better life comes with better health, more meaning or purpose, or a clearer sense of direction for this season of your life. 

Many of us also think about relationships when we think about a better life.  If my family was healthier, if my marriage was stronger, if I had a better relationship with my kids, or parents, if my real circle of friends was stronger, if I had that special someone in my life… then my life would be better.  Relationships are key to experiencing a better life for all of us so our better life list probably has something on there about relationships, but I wonder how many of us included a stronger relationship with God. 

In this series on searching for a better life, we are looking at Paul’s letter to the Ephesians.  At the beginning of his letter, Paul said this was his prayer for the people - Ephesians 1:17-20.

Paul wanted the people to experience a better life by knowing God more.  Paul wants our eyes and the eyes of our hearts opened so that we can more fully understand just how important a relationship with God is to every aspect of our lives.  This was important to Paul because he believed that when people knew God more they would have more hope, they would understand more of the riches they had in Christ, and they would be able to tap into the power of the Holy Spirit, which was the same power that raised Jesus from the dead. 

Think about it, if our lives were filled with hope, and if we could see all the riches we have in God, and if we could experience the power of the Holy Spirit that could help us deal with and overcome all of life’s problems - wouldn’t our lives be better?  YES!  A better life for all of us will be found when we have a strong relationship with God.

The first thing that needs to be on our better life list is a healthy, strong, and growing relationship with God.  The first thing we need to do in life is to learn to live at peace with God which only comes by surrendering ourselves to God’s grace and love, and allowing Jesus to forgive us and lead us.  The great thing about making peace with God first is that once we get this right, most other relationships will improve automatically. 

Look at Ephesians 2:13-14.  Once we find peace with God, we begin to find peace with one another because God is working to bring us all together in one body.  While Paul is specifically talking about Jews and Gentiles coming together in Christ, the reality is that if we allow God to dwell in us, we will begin to experience peace with one another.  We will have to make stronger relationships with one another a priority, and we will have to work at by offering others patience, forgiveness and grace, but we will find the courage, strength, and power to develop these healthier and stronger relationships when we are first find peace with God. 

So any better life list has to start with our relationship with God and then we will see improvements in our relationships with others, and once our relationships are strong, we often find many of the other items on our list falling into place.  So when you make a better life list this week, put God first, but then add to it the other things that are important to you, the things you know you need in order to experience a better life,  I want to encourage you to make this list because it will help us set priorities, and it will keep us focused and working toward these goals.  Making these lists is important.

In 1918, Charles Schwab was the president of Bethlehem Steel and while his company was already the largest ship building company, and the second largest steel producer in America, he was always trying to improve himself and his company.  To that end, he invited Ivy Lee, a business consultant, to work with his company. 

Lee said, give me 15 minutes with each of your executives and I will get more out of your company.  Schwab asked how much it would cost and Lee said, nothing.  In 3 months you send me a check for what you think my advice was worth.  Schwab agreed and each of the company executives met with Lee and were given his simple method of achieving peak productivity.  This is what Lee shared:

1. Write down the SIX most important things you need to accomplish tomorrow. 
2. PRIORITIZE these items in order of their importance.
3. Concentrate only on the FIRST item before moving on to the SECOND item.  
4. At the end of the day, move any unfinished items to a NEW LIST  for the following day.
5. REPEAT  this process every working day.

Schwab and his company did this and at the end of 3 months he was so happy with the results that he sent Lee a check for $25,000 ($400,000 today).  It is said that Schwab made these lists for the rest of his life because he found it very helpful and success. 

Whether it is in business or finding a better life, this is a great process for three reasons. 
#1 it is simple.  Make a list.  We can all do that. 

#2 it forces us to make tough decisions.   We can not put everything on the list so we have to make difficult decisions about what is ultimately important.  Then we have to go through this list and set some difficult priorities. 

#3 it forces us onto a single task.  Too many of us try to do too many things at the same time and regardless of what you think or what you may hear, multitasking is not efficient or effective. 

While we can do more than one thing at a time, we can not concentrate on more than one thing at a time.  When we concentrate on something, our brain is focused on that one thing, and then when we think about something else, our brain has to stop, shift, and start over again.  While we think we are doing this seamlessly, we are not.  It takes time for our brain to make these transitions and studies show that it can take over a minute for our brains to make this shift.  Multitasking is actually wasting precious time. 

So making a better life list, prioritizing what’s on that list, and working it one item at a time can help us experience that better life.  Most of the items on our list are not going to be finished and removed by the end of the day, and that’s ok, but we may find success in some areas that means we may need to shift priorities from day to day so that we work on different things. 

Now as soon as we make this list, something is going to come along to pull us away from that list.  It never fails.  Just when you set the date for the family to all sit down to dinner - someone’s schedule is going to change, a game is going to be rescheduled, or an appointment is going to come up that can’t be moved..  Conflict will come along and challenge our relationships and our priorities, so it is in these moments of conflict, and when we have had to give up our list, that we need to come back and Re-enlist. 

As important as creating the better life list is, being willing to re-enlist, to turn back to that list when we get pulled away, is just as important.  And the truth is that we need to re-enlist day after day after day.  In many ways, this is what we talked about last week in being resilient.  We stand, we stand firm and when we fail and fall, we stand back up, and standing back up means re-enlisting.     

Growing in our relationships, finding success in our jobs, moving forward in our finances is all a matter of re-enlisting and giving ourselves to the priorities we have set, and every time we turn back to that list here is what we need to remember - practice first what is first on the list. 

What is ultimately most important in our living a better life?  We have to practice this first because it is the key to everything.  While in some sense God always needs to be first on that list, there are times when circumstances will come up and we will need to put our family first on the list for a day, or week, because we know we have neglected that or let that slide.  Setting the priority for each day is important so that we can practice first what is first on the list.   

If you don’t think this method of creating a better life list and then re-enlisting day after day is important, then think about this.  How did God help his people in the Old Testament live a better life.  They had just been freed from generations of slavery and were headed into the promised land, a better life.  To help them achieve that life, God gave them a list, a list carved in stone on Mt. Sinai, a list of the 10 commandments.  Let’s take a look at this list.

1. You shall have no other gods before Me.
2. You shall not make for yourself an idol.
3. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.
4. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. 
5. Honor your father and your mother.
6. You shall not murder.
7. You shall not commit adultery.
8. You shall not steal.
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
10. You shall not covet.

There are two interesting things to note about this list.  The fist is that everything on this list helps strengthen relationships.  Either our relationship with God, our relationship with families, or our relationship with the larger community, but each commandment helps strengthen relationships - which tells us that a better life is really found in better and healthier relationships.

And then did you notice that God put first on the list the things that were most important, our relationship with God.  The first 4 commandments all focus on keeping our hearts, minds and lives centered on God because it is knowing God more that leads to a better life.  It is knowing God more that helps us have better relationships with those around us and that leads to a better life.

So lists are important, they keep us centered and focused.  They help us set priorities and commit to those priorities.  To experience a better life we need to not just turn to those better life lists but re-enlist, recommit ourselves to them, again and again. 


Next Steps
Searching for a Better Life - Re-Enlist

What is on your Bucket List? 
What items have you been able to cross off your bucket list?

What would you put on your Better Life List? 

The Ivy Lee Method of more productive living:
1. Write down the SIX most important things you need to accomplish tomorrow.
2. PRIORITIZE these items in order of their importance.
3. Concentrate only on the FIRST item before moving on to the SECOND item. 
4. At the end of the day, move any unfinished items to a NEW LIST  for the following day.
5. REPEAT  this process every working day.

 This week create a Better Life List that you can commit to.
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