Fruit of the Spirit ~ Patience

Last week we saw how peace may be the one fruit of the spirit that God most wants us to experience, but I have a feeling that the fruit of the spirit we most want to experience is not peace but patience. We are not a very patient people and the evidence is all around us. Not long ago a woman called 911 because McDonalds had run out of Chicken McNuggets, and here’s the thing, she didn’t call once, she called 3 times because the police didn’t get there fast enough. Not long before that a man had called 911 because Burger King had run out of lemonade. Now while these cases might seem a little extreme, have you ever gotten upset because a fast food restaurant was taking too long? Have you ever stopped the microwave 5 or 10 seconds before it’s done because you didn’t want to wait for it to finish? I confess that I am guilty of that one all the time, and while these are comical examples of our impatience, there are more serious examples that have a huge impact on our lives and even our nation. Think about credit card debt, it is one of the biggest economic problems we face and the reason we have such high debt is because we are impatient. We buy things on credit because we don’t want to wait until we have the money in hand to purchase it. Impatience hurts our finances, and it also hurts our relationships? We often expect people to change their behavior to suit our desires and expectations, and when people don’t change fast enough, we are quick to give up on them instead of taking the time to work things out.

In our instant gratification society, we do not wait well, but patience is more than waiting. The Greek word for patience is macrothumia. Macro means long and thuma means temper, so patience literally means being long tempered – not throwing a temper tantrum for a long time, but having it take a long time before we lose our temper. And our word patience comes from the latin word pati which means endurance and pathos which means to suffer, so again we see that patience means more than waiting, it means to endure suffering. Patience is being steadfast and strong even as we are being tested. Patience is enduring ill treatment by others without getting angry or finding ways to get revenge.
A great biblical example of this kind of patience is seen in Jesus during the last day of his life. Last week we saw how Jesus was a man of great peace during his final hours and it was that peace which led to incredible patience with all the people around him. Let’s review the story again, when Jesus friends all fell asleep in the garden of Gethsemane after he had asked them to stay awake and pray with him, Jesus didn’t seek any kind of retaliation and he doesn’t walk on out them - he continues to lead them and he reaches out to them in love. When Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss, he didn’t seek revenge. When Jesus was unjustly accused before the religious and political leaders he didn’t get angry and when people threw insults at him as he hung on the cross, Jesus didn’t think of ways to get even –Jesus not only endured the suffering, he even was even willing to forgive. That is what it means to be patient. Real patience isn’t just waiting and it’s not enduring trials and tribulations, it’s reaching out in love as we endure.

Now just like all the fruit of the spirit, patience is not something we can go out and get on our own – patience grows in us as we stay connected to God. From the life of Jesus we see that patience comes as we experience God’s peace and God’s peace comes when we know that God’s love and joy are with us. In so many ways the fruit of God’s spirit is all interconnected and they all require us to stay connect to God through Jesus Christ. So first and foremost, patience will only develop in us as we stay connected to God, but there are some things we can do to become more patient and we can find some of these things from Psalm 40:1-3.

Right away we see that David is already patient here: I waited patiently for the Lord. David is not looking for patience, he is already patient, so the question is where did the patience come from? Well let’s look at what David is doing here. Psalm 40:1b says, God turned to me and heard my cry. What David is doing is crying out to God, so before patience comes prayer, but it’s not just any kind of prayer David is offering up, he is crying out to God. The kind of prayer that develops patience is openly and honestly laying ourselves before God. If we read through the psalms, that is what we see over and over again from David. He never hides himself from God. When David has questions he asks God boldly for answers. Look at Psalm 10:1. David is not arrogant, but with boldness and courage he looks for answers. When David needs help he is also honest with God. Psalm 16:1 & Psalm 51:1-2. Whether David is looking for answers, or strength or forgiveness – he is not afraid to come before God and simply cry for help. This kind of honest prayer helps develop a strong relationship with God and as our relationship with God grows, we stay connected to the vine, and as we stay connected to the vine – the fruit of God’s spirit grows in us and patience comes.

So if we want patience we need to pray, but it’s not just crying out to God that we need to do in prayer, we also need to ask God for patience. Now I have heard many people say that they are afraid to ask God for patience because the fear is if we do, God will send all kinds of trials and problems into our lives so that we can learn to become more patient during those times of trial. While patience does grow as we endure difficult times, the other truth we need to remember is that if we ask God for patience he might just give it to us. When I was growing up I was not a very patient child. In fact, I was good at throwing temper tantrums and I really excelled at stomping up stairs and slamming doors. As I became a Christian during college I began to understand that I needed to be more patient so I told my friends that I was going to pray for patience. Everyone told me I should not do this because more problems would come into my life, but I did pray for patience and something very interesting happened - I became more patient.

It was during my sophomore year of college that I prayed for patience and that following summer I went to work in Yellowstone NP. Now things didn’t always work out smoothly that summer, there were lots of little problems that normally would have upset me, but as I went through that summer I realized that I never seemed to get frustrated or angry. I just went along day by day with a sense of peace that I never had before. In fact, all summer long people kept telling me how patient I was, and I always asked them if they would be willing to write that down and send it to my Mom because she would never believe that I could be patient. I had prayed for patience and God granted me patience. I didn’t learned patience through the difficulties of that summer; God gave me the patience to make it through the difficulties of that summer. I had prayed for patience and God gave me patience. The way I look at it, if patience is a fruit of the spirit that God wants us to have - then there is no reason we should not ask God for it. Asking God for patience will not bring difficult times into our lives, the reality is that difficult times are going to come – but if we ask for patience, then we just might find the spirit of God developing patience in us to help us through those difficult times.

So patience comes as we pray, but patience also comes as we persevere through the trials of life. There’s no getting around the idea that patience does develop and strengthen as we endure through times of suffering and pain. We heard this a few weeks ago when we read James 1:2-4. We become mature and complete when we endure through times of testing and trial. While God may grant us patience to help us through those times, we still need to go through those times and as we walk through them, our patience will grow. Pastor John Hoffman tells the story a young father in a supermarket who was pushing a shopping cart with his little boy strapped in the front seat. All through the store his son was fussy, irritable, and crying, but the father seemed to be very calm as he continued to push the cart around the store saying softly, "easy now, Donald. Keep calm. Steady boy. It's going to be alright, Donald." A mother who had passed by was so impressed by this young father's attitude that she stopped and said, "You certainly do know how to talk to an upset child." And then she bent down to the little boy and said, "Now Donald what seems to be the trouble?" The father looked at her somewhat confused and said, "Oh no, ma’am, his name is Henry. I'm Donald.”

What Donald shows us is that sometimes we just have to get ourselves through the store; we have to do whatever it takes to get ourselves through the difficult times in life step by step. It might mean talking to ourselves moment by moment, or it might mean talking to God moment by moment and asking God for the strength and the power to endure. Again, we see this in David’s life; look at what he says in Psalm 40:2.

Now God could only lift David up out of the mud and mire of his life because David was still in the mud and mire of his life. David had not given up on his problems or given in to despair. Too often our frustration and our inability to wait causes us to give up, but the key to deepening our patience is to not give up but just make it to the next minute, and then the next hour, and then the next day. As we endure day by day – patience grows. Times of trial should not be avoided or cursed, we need to endure them with faith and trust.

So patience grows as we pray and as we endure hardships and trials, but patience also grows right here during times of worship. Look at Psalm 40:3. One of the other things that helped David develop patience was worship. Our ongoing worship of God develops patience because it is during times of worship that we are reminded who God is and how just patient God has been with us. In 2 Peter 3:9 it says the Lord is patient with us, and it is during times of worship that we are reminded of God’s forgiveness and grace. It is during times of worship that we remember God’s unconditional love. In 1 Timothy 1:15-16 it says…
When we realize just how patient God has been with us, it gives us a sense of perspective and it reminds us that God gives us the strength we need to offer this same love and grace and forgiveness to others. Worship reminds us that is God patient with us, and so we can be patient with others.

If you want patience - stay connected to God in prayer. Open yourself up fully to God and even be bold and ask God for patience. If you want patience endure hardships and trials with the understanding that this time of testing will bring us to maturity, look the future and trust God to lift you up, and if you want patience, continue to worship God and allow the presence and power of God to give you the strength needed to endure.